The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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