Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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