Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
