how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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