OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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