puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
