Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
