Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
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and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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