SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
