just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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