Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Floor bacon is actually really good
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
