I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
