She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
