What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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