Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
