Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
