i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just want nice things and good sex
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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