Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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