drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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