Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
