My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
this will be a night to untag.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
