What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
