What did we do last night that was yellow?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
