Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize