You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
