I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
That accounts for only three of the penises
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
