I skipped work to stalk him.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
