i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
