Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
