we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize