found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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