The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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