it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
