Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
