found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
