so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
