My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
You know, be my cock's hype man.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Floor bacon is actually really good
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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