The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
