We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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