I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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