so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
