It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
