Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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