i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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