did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
