All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
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