Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
