that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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