Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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