Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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